TRADITIONS

The definition of a tradition–the transmission of beliefs from generation to generation or the fact of being passed on in this way. Most of us have family traditions that we associate with Christmas. These are altered by births, deaths and marriages.

My first memory of celebrating the holiday was Christmas Eve. I took Mom’s place going to the barn with Dad for evening milking. I couldn’t do the work she did but I did keep him company. She was preparing a ham supper for Uncle Hookie, Aunt Frannie and their nearly grown daughters, Doris and Sis, who would arrive at 7 p.m. loaded down with packages. While I was doing chores, Santa Claus left gifts under the tree in the living room. I could hardly wait until we all finished eating to open the presents, most of which were for me. This ended when Sis was married. I was twelve and no longer believed in the Jolly Old Elf but I missed the gathering when it was just the three of us.

Ken came into my life two years later. While he was gone serving in the U.S. Navy, his parents invited me to join their family for Christmas Day dinner and gifts.

Ken and I were married in 1959 and settled on his brother-in-law’s farm where Ken worked as hired man. As our family grew with two daughters, we continued to celebrate with both sets of grandparents.

Ken’s parents were killed in a car crash in the fall of 1962, seven months before our son was born. Lola Mae took her mother’s place cooking Christmas dinner for her two brothers’ families. As the Gaffney children began marrying, that gathering was replaced with a summer picnic.

Since we turned into a police family, Christmas is when we say it is to coincide with work and sleep hours. After all, it’s who gets together–not when we celebrate. Every year, Ken and I make rosettes, which was one of his mother’s holiday goodies and bratzelies, which were always made by the Tschabolds. I want to keep heritage alive for our children and grandchildren.

What traditions do you remember at Christmas time?

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JOKES

I think something my husband misses about being retired is the jokes he heard from fellow workers. When he went to a job, he always had a fresh gag or two when we attended a social gathering. Now that is missing. Jokes make life more fun.

My family never were wisecrackers, but they did have a sense of humor. While I was growing up, Dad and Mom listened to the radio and laughed at Bob Hope, Red Skelton and the comedians on the WLS National Barn Dance.

After Ken enlisted in the U.S. Navy, the first time I went to Chicago with Hazel and Rolland to visit him at Great Lakes Naval Station, I learned that his dad was a joke teller. We drove by a cemetery and Rolland said, “There’s a dead place, but everyone’s dying to go there.” I was on edge because I was with my boyfriend’s folks and I giggled, which was expected,

I’ve heard it’s easy to tell if you’re old or not when you fall down. Of course, the first thing you do is look around to see if anyone saw you. If people are laughing, you’re not old–if people rush to your side asking, “Are you all right?” you’re old.

We learn to laugh at ourselves. We even tell on ourselves to give our friends a good chuckle.

I think some of the old TV shows were funnier than the present ones. I’ll take a rerun of “Carol Burnett,” “All in the Family,” or “Sanford & Son” over what are billed as comedies today.

The longest lasting comedy show is “Saturday Night Live.” Beginning in 1975. the late-night live sketch comedy variety show often parodies contemporary American culture. It has received a vast number of awards during its five decades on air.

Are you a joke teller?

BELLY-FLOP

December reminds me of belly-flopping when I was among the nine pupils who attended the Putnam country school during the nineteen-fifties. We brought our sleds to school and at recess time slid down the road in front of the building. It was a long trek to the top but the ride down was worth it. There were only three farms on the two-mile stretch of gravel road so there was rarely any traffic to be concerned about. The local drivers were aware the kids might be sliding on the road so they came over the hill cautiously.

I had a big, Flexible Flyer sled. We three girls piled up on it–Mary Ann, the oldest of us, laid on her stomach on the bottom, I was in the middle and Sandy, the youngest, on top. As we shoved off, Mary Ann called, “Bumpers up,” which meant bend your knees. I still have a scar on my left shin because one of the boys didn’t steer straight and clipped my leg with the metal point on the front of his sled.

We each walked to school so we were dressed for the weather–snow pants, jacket, scarf, hat, mittens and boots. While we were outside, our mittens usually got wet from the snow. We dried them by laying them on the top of the oil burner that heated the school room.

That first snow fall was eagerly greeted by us, kids. Winter weather brought new games for us to play, “Fox and Goose,” snowball fights and building snowmen.

It brought all sorts of problems for our farmer parents. Pipes and animal waterers froze up often requiring paying a plumber to get the system working again. Ice made walking treacherous for animals and people.

What memories do you have as a child playing in the snow?

THANKSGIVING

I am thankful for Durand, my home community all of my life. Durand’s population as estimated by this year’s census is 1,364. The community has always been considered as the school district which includes the surrounding area. Durand is a one-mural town. The Durand Charm organization had a panorama painted on the south side of an old brick, building on the east side of the square. It highlights the people and places significant in the village’s history such as the first volunteer fire department in the state.

The people who have had faith in the community to start a business here are what kept the area productive.

Four generations of my family have graduated from Durand High School, beginning with the two women who were members of the class of 1930. All of the adults have been educated and prepared to pursue their career of choice.

We’ve had our storms but none have wiped out our community. Chain saws and the electric company have restored us.

We have a police force but crime is not a big issue.

Durand is centrally located–it’s about twenty miles from Rockford, the county seat, Freeport, plus the Wisconsin cities of Monroe and Beloit. Sometimes this is a curse, when I want something from two towns in opposite directions.

Medina Manor, the local, nursing home and rehabilitate center, which also provides retirement apartments has, won state recognition for excellence.

Saelens Park is also one of our community assets. Its paths provide walking and biking lanes away from traffic, and facilities for various games. Its Otter Creek becomes a raceway for plastic, yellow duckies during the 4th of July festivities.

Several years ago, the community adopted the motto “village of volunteers.” We have Mary’s Closet, which has donations of used clothing and s free pantry for those who need help at no cost. Through the years, our family has benefited from the community’s generosity and been part of the giving network.

Recently, I knocked on some neighbors’ doors to add their cell phone numbers to my list of contacts in case I needed help when I was home alone.

I don’t know all of the people in the community like I did when we moved into town in 1966, but I am glad I live here.

What are you thankful for this season?

RECOGNITION

As I put my groceries in my car in the parking lot, I noticed the auto sitting close behind mine. The personalized license plate on the Buick must belong to my old friend, Sandy. It had been a while since I’d seen her so I sat in my Chrysler for a few minutes waiting for her to exit the store. I would catch up chatting with her if she had a few free minutes.

I’d met Sandy when we attended the Putnam country grade school. She’s two years younger than I am We graduated from the same, small high school, settled in the Durand community and belonged to the same. monthly, bridge club for about forty years. Otherwise, we haven’t moved in the same circle of friends. It seems like we would run into each other often but it doesn’t happen.

When she came to her car, I got out and greeted her.

She said, “I don’t recognize you.”

It seemed odd considering how long we’d known one another but I really shouldn’t be surprised. Sometimes I hardly realize that octogenarian I see in the mirror the last thing before I go to bed is me. I repeated my name.

When Ken and I were selling my memoir, “The View from a Midwest Ferris Wheel,” at craft and book fairs, we exhibited photos from his stint as a sailor wearing his dress blues and my high school graduation so people would get the idea that the story was about our seven-year courtship during the 1950s.

I hate to admit I don’t recognize someone I haven’t seen for a while, especially if they call me by name. I’m sure the vagueness in my eyes and the comments I made give me away.

Do you readily admit that you don’t recognize an old friend that you meet after a long time apart?

OPEN

One of the frustrating things in my life is trying to open various containers. These old fingers don’t always have the strength to press down on the cover and twist or squeeze the cap at the arrows and turn. After I remove the lid, there’s a shiny seal to deal with. Several tiny tabs around the rim are supposed to lift it off but it doesn’t seem to work that way for me.

These problems were apparently brought about by the “Tylenol scare,” which began September 29, 1982. The first of seven individuals died in the Chicago metropolitan area after ingesting Extra Strength Tylenol that had been deliberately contaminated with cyanide. The company pulled 31 million bottles of the tablets back from retailers; the first major recall in American history. Ten weeks after the withdrawal, Johnson & Johnson placed tamper resistant, triple sealed safety containers of the pain reliever on the shelves of retailers.

That same year, the U.S. passed a federal law that made tampering a crime. Legislation approved in 1989 requires tamper proof pharmaceutical packaging. It isn’t just pill bottles that are a problem for me to open. For years, I’ve applied baby oil to my wet body after a shower. To open a new one, I must first remove a clear, plastic seal and then squeeze the cover to open it the first time. After that, the lid can be put on loosely.

When I open a new ground cinnamon to sprinkle on my apple pie, I must remove the shiny silver seal with the wee tabs lurking under the rim.

I think of the magical phrase, “open sesame,” from the children’s story, “Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves” in Antoine Galland’s version of One Thousand and One Nights. It opens the mouth of a cave in which forty thieves have hidden a treasure. If only that phrase would work for me.

Does anyone have an easy way to open these containers?

VETERANS

Next Monday is Veterans Day, a time to recognize all veterans who have honorably served our country. The federal holiday continues to be November 11 in remembrance of the ending of the Great War at 11 o’clock in the morning of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918. At that time, it was known as “the war to end all wars.” If only that were true.

During World War II (1939 – 1945), which my generation remembers, every family had at least one member in the service. Although I was a child, I was aware of the sacrifices and shortages on the home front caused by the war effort. Our land has not known another time like that since.

At school, we began each day with the “Pledge of Allegiance.” We still stand with our hands over our hearts for the playing of “The Star-Spangled Banner” and when Old Glory passes by during a parade just like we were taught those many years ago.

During the Korean conflict (1950 – 1953), a draft continued to conscript young men into the army. President Lyndon B. Johnson maintained that this country could have both “guns and butter.”

A lottery system was used to determine the order of conscription of young men to military service during the Vietnam War (1954 – 1975). Citizens often gave more support to the protestors than the soldiers.

Since 1973, the United States military has been all volunteer. Air Force Gen. Paul J. Selva, said only 1 percent of our population will ever wear the uniform of this country.

Some of those who have given a portion of their life for the USA wear a significant tee shirt or a cap to proudly proclaim they are veterans. Often, the only recognition these men and women ever receive is a “Thank you for your service,” from an appreciative citizen.

Have you voiced your gratitude to a veteran for his or her contribution to your freedom?

HALLOWEEN

Tomorrow night you’ll be hearing “Trick-or-treat” from little, costumed children knocking on your door. They aren’t prepared to carry out the trick part of their threat–just carrying a bag to hold the candy they expect you to hand them. Kids used to soap windows or string toilet paper in trees as Halloween pranks. In the Durand area, some ‘big kids’ hauled outhouses to public places. I haven’t seen any evidence of mischief for quite a few years.

According to what I’m seeing in the news, many towns held a trunk-or-treat program in their downtown area during a daylight time to give the kids an added time to gather candy.

I’ve read on social media that school teachers have a tough time in the classroom on November 1 coping with students who are hyped up from eating large amounts of sugar.

When our three kids were trick-or-treating fifty years ago, children were urged to trick-or-treat for UNICEF and give up their candy bars in favor of cash dropped into the little orange boxes they held.

In our village, the powers-that-be didn’t want to deprive the witches and goblins of their treats; it just asked neighbors to donate twice. On Sunday night, the costumed kids would be asking for contributions to UNICEF but whatever night of the week was Halloween, the small monsters would be back knocking on the doors requesting their goodies.

In thinking about Halloween, I wondered if there was still a UNICEF–I hadn’t heard about it for years. I’m not advocating for it–I just wanted to satisfy my curiosity.

I found it still in existence on the internet. The letters stand for the original name of the United Nations International Children’s Emergency fund, which has been shortened to the United Nations Children’s Fund. It was created in 1946 as a response to the needs of children affected by World War II and became a permanent United Nations agency in 1953. It is a critical, flexible funding that can be used for programs that provide essentials such as education, safe water and vaccinations when and where they need it most.

Have you ever had trick-or-treaters for UNICEF?

ROCKING

Rocking chairs have been the subject of popular songs a couple times that I remember. During the 1940s, the quartet, the Mills Bros., sang “Old Rocking Chair’s Got Me.” In 1992, country singer, George Jones, who was in his sixties, declared, “I Don’t Need Your Rockin’ Chair.”

For the past thirty years, my seat in the living room has been a padded rocking chair and matching foot stool. In the beginning, it worked well for soothing grandbabies. Through the years, it has been ideal for reading and watching TV.

A study published in the American Journal of Alzheimer’s Disease and Other Dementia found that “there were improvements in depression/anxiety and reductions in pain medication significantly related to amount of rocking.” Those residents that enjoyed the program and wanted to continue rocking past the six weeks of the study “demonstrated significant improvements in balance as measured by center of gravity.”

Rocking chairs provide older adults with many advantages. Rocking works the muscles and the tendons of the thighs, the lower legs and ankles helping to keep you fitter.

As little as ten minutes of rocking s day can reduce blood pressure and improve circulation.

The rocking chair combined with some basic exercises can help relieve chronic back pain. The late JF Kennedy frequently used his rocking chair yo help ease his chronic back problems.

R0cking causes the release of endorphins that elevates the mood and relieves pain plus rocking can even lead to some weight loss as you burn 150 calories per hour with this form of exercise.

One of the things I saved from my parents’ home was a little rocker that Mom had recovered several times through the years. It was always one of my favorite perches. I think it must have been part of their original furniture when they married in 1935.

Do you enjoy a rocking chair?

TEAMMATES

This fall, our daughter, Lisa, and our granddaughter, Katelyn, are teammates participating in a women’s recreational volleyball league in Rockford. Katelyn sums up the relationship, “Lisa’s the oldest by about a decade and I’m the youngest by about a decade, but we are the two best players.” Her statement reminds me of the 1960s TV series, “The Guns of Will Sonnet,” and Walter Brennan’s catch phrase, “No brag–just fact.”

Girls’ competitive sports in high schools began more than fifty years ago when Title IX became federal law in 1972. The change was just in time to include Lisa, who loves athletics.

When Katelyn was a member of Durand High School girls’ volleyball team during the early 2000s, Aunt Lisa watched from the bleachers and was a boisterous booster.

Some of the girls of earlier generations enjoyed the rough and tumble of sports but society placed more limits on young ladies’ behavior. My mother, who was a member of the class of 1930, the first to complete four years in the new Durand High School built on the north side of West South Street. In her Physical Education classes, they played girls’ rules basketball, which is much more restrictive than the fellows’ version. There were six players on each team, three on each side of the court and neither trio was allowed to cross the center line. A player could only bounce the ball twice in succession so there was no dribbling. Mom and some of her friends played the rowdier, boys’ rules basketball in the gymnasium during their lunch hour.

When I attended DHS in the 1950s, we still played the same girls’ rules basketball in P.E., as my mother’s era. About twenty of us belonged to the Girls Athletic Association, which met after school once a week to engage in various sports among themselves.

High school athletic programs have been studied for more than a century. According to the experts, three of the most important participation takeaway that students continue to practice after graduation are: 1) a stronger sense of self-confidence in building relationships with others and having an expanded capacity for empathy, (2) developing better understanding of self and in so doing understanding how their actions affect others and (3) building foundations for lifelong fitness habits.

Have you ever played competitive sports?