After our three kids were enrolled in school, I acquired two part-time jobs–Rockford Morning Star community correspondent and Durand Township clerk. I read self-help books to learn how to combine working at home with being a housewife and mother. The experts advised setting short-term and long-term goals.
I devised a life plan. My first twenty years had been devoted to me. My goals for the next twenty years would put my family ahead of my freelancing because I chose to marry and have children. By the time I was forty, our kids would no longer need my supervision. I’d still have at least another twenty years to concentrate on my writing.
That idea was shot down when a school psychologist diagnosed Linda as retarded. Through the years, the terminology changed, but our oldest child would never be an independent adult. She attended special education classes provided by the co-op formed by the districts located in Winnebago County outside of Rockford. I joined the parents group seeking to establish a sheltered workshop to employ our children when they no longer attended school.
I often scuttled my plans to adjust to a change in schedule for one of our kids or my husband who worked cop shifts plus moonlighting as a semi driver. I learned to cherish flexibility instead of the frustration of setting goals and not reaching them.
Now, I’m an empty-nester with a retired husband, but I haven’t changed my habits. Once in awhile, an article must be submitted to meet a deadline or a special holiday family dinner prepared, but, most of the time, what doesn’t get done today can be achieved tomorrow or the next day. I believe that, in the long run, I accomplish as much with my flexibility as my goal-setting friends. They probably wouldn’t agree.
Do you set goals or are you flexible?