For as long as I can remember, I’ve heard, “You can choose your friends but you’re stuck with your relatives.” But, how do we select our companions? I’ve never entered a crowd with the idea of picking some new pals. My cohorts usually are contacts from school and work, neighbors or friends of friends.
Karen was my first ‘bestie’. I met her when I started first grade at our one-room, country school with an enrollment of about ten boys and girls in the various eight grades. Although she was a year older, we enjoyed doing things together such as riding bicycles and ponies.
From seventh through twelfth, I was bussed into Durand where I had 20 to 30 classmates. I hit-it-off with country lasses who enjoyed playing sports. When I started going out with Ken, we double-dated with his buddies and their girlfriends. Those gals became my confidantes. After graduation, my office co-workers were my intimates.
When I was a nineteen-year-old patient in a TB sanitarium for five months, I met people who were different from me. My daily companions were the four, younger females assigned to the women’s floor: Rosie, a married lady in her early twenties who had black hair, brown eyes and a dark complexion; Sue, a lively, 16-year-old, high school junior, who was my roommate; Florence, a woman of color, who I thought was about my age until she told me she was a 40-year-old widow with three children; and Sako, a newly-wed from Japan. She had married an Illinois farmer after he was stationed in her country during his enlistment in the Air Force. Our affliction brought us together and we found many commonalities.
People marry and move, which often affects friendships. After Ken and I bought our home in Durand, Sherrill, a neighbor who lived in the same block, became my crony. We each had three kids who were similar ages and played together. Her husband worked the p.m. shift in a nearby factory and Ken worked rotating shifts at the sheriff’s department and ‘moonlighted’ as a truck driver. When she and I had free time, we enjoyed playing Scrabble or just visiting.
Sometimes a shared interest brings people together. When I started writing, I joined groups who put words on paper.
How have you chosen your friends?