My identity is who, deep down, I think of myself–not how others see me. I’ve had many titles during my lifetime. People have asked me, “Are you Alex or Bobbie Tschabold’s daughter?” Later, it has been, “Oh, you’re Ken’s wife,” or aren’t you Lisa’s mother or Kurt’s mother? One day I was shopping in a Rockford store and heard a woman’s voice ring out, “Hi, Mary’s friend. I’m sorry, but I don’t remember your name.” I had recently met the preacher’s wife when we ate lunch with our mutual friend.
For forty-six years, I served as Durand’s Town Clerk but I considered that just an enjoyable, part-time job. Like all of the township officials in the state, I received a complimentary, monthly magazine that included a column addressed to clerks written by a woman who apparently thought of the post as part of her identity.
I am the matriarch of a police family. Ken and I are fortunate that our family has remained in the area and followed the tradition of law and order begun by Ken’s dad, Rolland, who was a Freeport motorcycle officer in the 1930s before he was married. Ken and our son, Kurt, are retired from the Winnebago County Sheriff’s Police; our daughter, Lisa, is retired from the Illinois State Police; our grandson, Jacob, is a cop with the Rockford Police Department and our granddaughter, Katelyn, is an assistant prosecutor with the Winnebago County State’s Attorney Office. I’ve learned to juggle the 24/7 work times and sleeping hours so that we could all get together to celebrate special occasions and holidays.
I also consider myself a journalist. Instead of education and experience, I entered the writing world 55 years ago through the backdoor of learn-by-doing. As a freelancer, I’ve sold articles to area newspapers and national magazines. Three years ago, Adelaide Books published my memoir, “The View from a Midwest Ferris Wheel,” the story of our seven-year courtship in the 1950s. I enjoy writing nonfiction including my blog, lolita-s-bigtoe.com. but I never had a desire to write fiction.
What makes up your identity?
I too have worn many titles: farmer’s daughter, 4-H participant with a garden, calf, sewn skirt & arrangements for home grounds improvement; salutatorian; college student & graduate; wife four times; mother twice; writing group leader; sister; friend, horse back rider, & gardener. I think that is about enough.